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Divorce Procedures and Choices

  • DON’T BELIEVE RADIO ADVERTISING: Divorce Mediation Faster, Safe, Costs Less than Litigation

    Some lawyers, trying to secure more divorce clients, trash mediation in their radio ads. Contrary to these advertisement’s claims, mediation frequently results in a better understanding of dispute issues and legally binding agreements, at less emotional and financial cost than litigation. Mediation uses an impartial third-party to help people discuss their disputes, decide next steps

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  • CUSTODY: Trying to work out parenting plan works in your favor

    CUSTODY ARRANGEMENTS:  BEING ACCOMMODATING WHEN CHOOSING YOUR PARENTING PLAN DOESN’T PREJUDICE YOUR RIGHTS IN LITIGATION A mediation colleague recently blogged about the advantages of  mediation over litigated divorce in working out the right parenting plan for your child or children. One advantage of mediation (which advantage is also present in collaborative divorce cases) is that

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  • Tax Treatment of Spousal Maintenance – How Will the New Tax Laws Impact on my Divorce?

    DEDUCTIBLE FOR THE PAYOR, TAXABLE FOR THE PAYEE — FOR HOW LONG? Alimony, now known in New York as maintenance, has as its premise in the idea that the so-called “monied spouse” in a divorce should make payments to the non-monied spouse in order to allow the non-monied spouse time to become self-supporting. Back in the

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  • DIVORCE MEDIATION – Can I also have my own attorney?

    The title of the children’s book It Takes a Village could apply just as easily to divorce. Psychologists, social workers and financial advisors all have perspectives that may be useful to divorcing spouses, and many practitioners in these disciplines have successful businesses as divorce coaches. However, one profession that’s often overlooked when choosing a coach is lawyers.

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  • Going the Last Mile in Divorce

    By Jane Cottrell, Guest Blogger Katherine Miller blogged  on the subject of why it’s so hard for people to finish their divorce. Kathryn Lazar wrote a blog  (you can read it here) that struck me as a companion piece. When I thought about it, I realized that these two articles captured something I had experienced.

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  • Splitting up or Divorcing? Top Ten Strategies to Maintain Your Sanity

    Many divorce clients who meet with us for the first time are stressed out and imagining multiple horrible possible things that might happen.  Most of those things won’t happen, but when anxiety takes over, it is hard to think straight.  We strongly recommend realistic thinking — which is neither overly optimistic nor overly pessimistic.  But it

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  • Getting Divorced? Put YOUR Oxygen Mask On: Five strategies for surviving a break up

    One of the biggest challenges people experience when beginning the separation and divorce process is maintaining their sense of sanity.  Most people experience a wide range of emotions, and get caught up in the details of their own personal life.  For most adults, this interferes with their ability to be good parents, to be good

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  • Proper Courtroom Behavior and Attire

    DON’T CANCEL OUT YOUR INVESTMENT IN LEGAL FEES BY DRESSING OR ACTING INAPPROPRIATELY A British website, judiciary.gov.uk, says “When you see a judge or magistrate sitting in court, you are actually looking at the result of 1,000 years of legal evolution.” The US judicial system is descended from the English system and inherits some but not

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  • Recordings of Children – Can they be used in court?

    IS RECORDING KIDS ILLEGAL EAVESDROPPING? Lately my work in custody cases has got me focused on the use of recordings of minor children as evidence in court. It’s so easy to record anything these days; just whip out your smartphone. But maybe using that smartphone isn’t so smart. When it comes to recording phone calls

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  • Pendente Lite Motions

    “LITE” DOESN’T MEAN LOW-CALORIE Pendente lite. It’s pronounced “pen-den-tay lee-tay” and it’s Latin for “pending the ligation.” The phrase refers to motions made before a court for judicial relief  (outcomes) needed by a party  during the pendency of a lawsuit, without waiting until it ends. For example, in a divorce the “non-monied” spouse may need to apply

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  • Collaborative Divorce–A Process Option Whose Time Has Come

    WHY COUPLES CHOOSE COLLABORATIVE LAW OVER COURT Kim Ciesinski recently wrote an excellent article in the New York Law Journal explaining the advantages of collaborative law over litigation in divorce cases. She identifies upsides including  client-driven negotiation, privacy, emotional guidance and financial expertise. In addition, she characterizes types of couples who tend to choose litigation, mediation and

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  • Thinking About Divorce–What to Consider First

    PERSONAL, FINANCIAL, AND LEGAL CONSIDERATIONS You’re thinking about divorce. It’s a complicated process, whether you look at it emotionally, financially or legally.  You are likely feeling all different emotions, sometimes minute to minute it changes – anger, confusion, fear, hurt, maybe nothing.   This is totally normal.  It is very important though to make rationale, educated,

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